There are some things in life I just don’t get. Actually, there are a lot of things in life I just don’t get, but I encountered three things today and thought I would share . . . or rant . . . however you prefer to look at it.
It started while I was waiting to pick up Dr. Smooth from the local high school. Now let me preface this by saying that I could create an entire list of “Things I Don’t Get” while waiting in line at the local high school, but I try to keep in mind that that they are high schoolers. Fashion, make-up, language, hormones—those are all things that on some level I remember dealing with, so I somewhat get it, and I try to allow a little leeway.
I mean, I grew up in the 80s. We wore neon, people. And legwarmers . . . over jeans. We channeled Irene Cara while constantly adjusting torn sweatshirts that were falling off our shoulders. And dare I admit that I owned a pair of vivid purple parachute pants? (Which I wore with turquoise and hot pink because I was just that cool.)
I had hair that was bigger than big, and I personally believed that Aqua Net was a gift from God in a gesture of His blessings on spiral perms and back-combing. (that’s when you tease your hair, y’all; it ain’t some sort of disgusting habit of grooming hair on my back.)
So when I see teenagers making fashion choices, I try really hard to be understanding. I realize I don’t have to like it to try to understand why they do it. Take the current fad of wearing pants so low they are past the point of no return. I don’t like it, but I understand why they want to do it if they think it’s cool.
What I don’t understand is how on earth they would run if they needed to. Some of them actually have to hold the pants up with one hand just to walk. So to run??? Granted, I don’t see them doing a lot of running, but still. Stuff happens, and you never know when somebody may be coming after you and you might need to run!
I spaz out just worrying about how I would run if I wore skimpy pajamas and someone broke in the house at night. (And if My Knight is not home at night, I wear my contacts to bed so I don’t have to worry about losing my glasses in case I need to run. But these are probably issues best discussed at another time.)
I try really hard to be open-minded, but I just don’t get how it’s masculine or attractive to walk around looking like you crapped in your britches, and now you need to pull them down low and walk all funny to keep it from getting on you.
I do understand the need for each generation to have its rebellious fashion statement. (Although I secretly wish this one would hurry up and die out so that whether a guy wears boxers or briefs could still be a mystery! A mystery that needs to be left unsolved in most cases.)
What I totally don’t get as I wait in the high school parking lot is the absolutely deafening stereo systems in cars. Today, my car was literally vibrating from the music coming from the road that runs alongside the school.
When the car turned into the parking lot and drove up beside me, I could not hear my own stereo playing. The change in my cup holder was rattling. (Or maybe that was my teeth; I’m not sure.) I could literally see his windows shake when the bass beat boomed. Wouldn’t that cause things on your car to rattle after awhile? (Oh—duh. It’s not like he can hear the rattle!)
Now, we had super-loud car stereos back in the 80s, but I didn’t get it then either. Can anyone explain this to me?? Is it a status symbol? Somehow the loudest stereo wins? Does it signify that you have money since you bought expensive speakers? (Although, wouldn’t that mean you had money, but now you don’t, because you spent it on the speakers?) Does it somehow make a statement about what cool taste you have in music? Like you’re saying, “Look at me! I listen to hip-hop. I am cool.”
I mean, I guess if truth be told, I get that on some level. When I was in high school, we had cassette-tape players, and we would pull over on the side of the road to rewind or fast-forward to that perfect song before pulling through any crowded place where other cool people might hear our music. No one would dare drive around with some lame, unknown, B-side song playing. Never!
We played it loud, but we didn’t play it at such deafening levels that if the really cute guy wanted to give us a shout out, we would never be able to hear him over the music.
The volume I am talking about is excruciating in an “I feel my personal space violated” kind of way. Why should I be forced to listen to your music? And not even really your music, just your boom?
Then the competition started. I am not sure if it was a “my stereo is louder than yours” competition or if it was an “I don’t like your music, so I’ll drown it out with my music” competition. But either way, I was caught in the middle with no little judge card to hold up scores. It was like that weird, eerie carnival music they play in cheap horror movies and bad dreams. Some bizarre morphing of salsa in one car and rap in another that makes your eyes twitch.
But as the second assault on my hearing was pulling past me, I noticed that the driver was wearing headphones. Seriously?! Are the headphones playing the same music you’re forcing me to listen to, or do you get a better selection? Are the headphones playing the same music because you’ve become deaf and can’t hear it blasting from the megaphone speakers in your car? Or are the headphones to help you block out the unbelievably obnoxious music you have chosen to play at full volume? And how is safe for you to drive a 2000 lb piece of machinery with headphones and deafening music in the car?
I can’t help but wonder if they turn the volume down when they get out of earshot of the parking lot. Is it just for show? Or do they truly enjoy listening to it that loud?
Now before you start thinking that this week’s birthday put me over the hill where I have started complaining about young whippersnappers’ fashion and music, let’s move on to the final item in my “I Don’t Get It Trilogy.” This one took place after I left the high school parking lot and was on the way home.
A lady was walking along the side of the road in town with curlers in her hair. You know you have all had a sighting of curlers moving about in public. This is something I have never understood. I don’t get it. Someone please enlighten me.My line of thinking is that you put curlers in your hair because you want your hair to be curled. Which leads me to believe that you care somewhat about your appearance, and specifically about the way your hair looks. So why on earth would you go out of the house and into the public with the freakin’ rollers still in your hair? Doesn’t that kind of defeat the whole purpose??
Why bother rolling curlers in your hair, which is not a quick and easy process, to improve your appearance if you are just going to let everybody see you with the curlers still in? Who are you rolling it for? Do you go out in public in the rollers, and then come home to sit on the couch and watch TV with pretty hair? I don’t get it.Do you get it? Do me a favor. Share this. Click share on Facebook. Email it to a friend. I want responses. I wanna know. Do you people get it? I don’t get it.